Fear, Falling Down and Forward Motion
In his new show “The Discussion”, Kevin Gregg sits down with various guests to discuss ideas, insights and inspiration. This episode Jeremy Van Cleave visits the show to talk about the challenges that people face when trying to follow their true calling.
Play Now! (43min)
I had an idea for a scene that I wanted to shoot. It would be relatively quick and wouldn’t involve much strenuous effort.
When the time came to shoot it at my house, I started getting in my own way.
“Well, the house should be cleaned first.”
“I should really get some rest, I have a long day tomorrow.”
“I haven’t been spending enough time with my wife and kids.”
Valid excuses?
No.
These are things that need and should happen, but I was putting them to the forefront so I could push my creative thoughts away.
I used these other things as scapegoats for why I wasn’t doing the work.
I finally decided to man up and shoot a test of what I wanted to do for my short scene. I used my wife , and guess what? It looked pretty cool.
It stirred the fire and stoked the coals of confidence.
I’m shooting the scene next week come hell or high water.
Because it needs to be made.
The house will get cleaned. I’ll get the rest. I will spend quality time with my wife and sons.
And the idea will be created.
vel·le·i·ty (vəˈlēətē) noun formal 1. a wish or inclination not strong enough to lead to action. "The notion intrigued me, but remained a velleity."
What an interesting word. ” A wish not strong enough to lead to action.”
How many fanciful thoughts have I had running through my head? I keep coming back to them again and again, because in my fantasy they seem cool.
But I don’t do the work to bring them into being.
It’s safer to keep them as an idea, because God forbid, once I take a step I have to see if there is substance to it.
The rubber has to hit the road at some point.
The hardest moment is making the first move, shooting the first frame of film, writing the first words.
Pull the trigger.
Because here’s an idea that’s going to help you out…
You won’t get it right the first time. You never do. This is not about attaining perfection instantaneously.
It’s about putting in the sweat and exercising the muscle.
Get velleity out of your head and start breaking some ground.
I think a part of the human condition is that we are never satisfied. That can be a good thing, because it can challenge you to grow, to stretch and to change for the good.
Sometimes it can be harmful.
Sometimes you stop looking at the great things that you have in your life, and start looking longingly at what other people have.
“If only I had their career, their house, their opportunities.”
Through this fog of “longing looking” you start to formulate an unhealthy mindset of what will make you happy. Suddenly you see something in the distance.
It’s a shimmering golden trophy.
“That’s it!” you say. “That’s what I need to be happy!”
So you start your journey to reach this distant trophy. It could be a better job, more money, more respect. It’s not the goal that’s wrong. It’s the intent.
Trying to find happiness in things.
If you think you will get that, you are mistaken.
Because you may get to that trophy someday, you will hold it in your hands and the golden glow will fade. It won’t bring you happiness.
Then like a Greek myth, in the distance you will see another golden trophy, and you will tell yourself “No, that’s what I really wanted! That will give me the happiness I seek!”
Off you will go on your never ending, never satisfying quest.
The truth is you have the actual treasures with you right now. In your family and friends, your challenges and relationships in the workplace. There is even treasure in the process of the work that you are doing right now.
Don’t let the dreamlike empty promise of the distant golden trophy cause you to walk right over the treasure chest of love, opportunity and work you have right now.
One more thought from C.S. Lewis
The amount of time that I have wasted worrying about a negative outcome is head shakingly bad.
I would work out in my head how things might go wrong. Or I would try to think like a master chess player and calculate every move and counter move I could do to avoid disaster.
More times than not, the thing that I thought would go wrong… never happened.
And on those rare occasions when something did go wrong… it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be.
There is a great sense of freedom when we stay in the moment and not worry about the future.
Time is a precious thing. Why waste it on nothing?
